Flesh and bones and what?

I would love to know what the world would be like a 100 years from now, 500 years from now, a 1000 years from now. But.. how would I know? I probably will have kids, and then grandkids, and maybe I can ask my grandkids, and then have them ask their grandkids, to send me pictures and videos of what the world is like "then". They will obviously have immensely advanced technology then... Well... whatever the technology is, my grandkids use it, and take snapshots of the future world, and put them in an envelope, or attach them in an email, ready to send them to me.
But... where will I be? What kind of a mailing address can they use? Where can they send it to? And though my email account would be active (no chance huh...), who will actually see those emails. What will happen to this entity called "me"? I know I will be dead, is there something after that?
The farthest I can go, is my grandkids, and then I will be forgotten. Just like that!
Check out the Bodies Museum, will give you an insight into how complex your body is, yet so fragile....

Innocence.. lost

The other day I was watching Forrest Gump, and I heard this person within me that wanted to come out, live and express freely. Maybe it was my soul.
In this hustle bustle of life, we don't realize when we are drained off the very essence of our being- innocence. A heart break, a humiliation, each passing year, bullies, take our our innocence in one form or the other, and then remains what is called "you" or "me".
Remember when we loved unconditionally, lived freely, laughed vivaciously, cried openly... Where did all that go?
Can we love unconditionally now? Not without the fear of getting hurt, not without expecting...
Can we cry openly now? Not without the thought of being judged, not without the fear of being labelled vulnerable....
What Forrest gave was love, what we give.. what is it?
So, is the world depriving us of innocence, or is it us?
Given a choice, would we want our innocence back in the same life, in the same world?

One of those days....

Yet another day...... where in my brain is bombarding me with questions, and my heart has no answers. I wander aimlessly, in search of the missing pieces of this enigma called life.
What is it that my heart craves for, what is it that my senses long for, what is it that's within me that is yearning to feel complete?
What is it that I want to do- get married? have kids? Or what is it that I am sceptical of doing- getting married? having kids?
It's been a while now, since these questions kept erupting within me, now and then, like dormant volcanoes, seemingly harmless, but who knows what lies beneath.
Now where is it that I can find answers for these- friend, mother, shrink?
Nowhere, except someday it should strike me like a bolt of lightning, maybe that will be my enlightenment.
But... what if it's too late?
The fear of dying with my dreams unrealized, sends shivers down my spine. What if I fail to realize what I want. As the last breath in me waits to get out, deep within, my core would feel incomplete, for a life not lived, for the dreams that remain unfulfilled, for the energy that is wasted, for the time that is lost....