Hollow are the earth and sky and God....

Empty cries from empty souls
No one to listen no one to hold
God is but a perception of the mind
Irrespective of events which unfold
Quest for the truth is uneventful
These days for pennies it is sold
Nothing matters no more
For, named names
Are the pure hearted and the bold

It's just a sprain....

So... this was one of the many evenings when I was practicing for an Indian and salsa dance number that me and 3 other guys were performing for raising funds for the American Diabetes Association. This evening turned out to be dreadful and unforgettable as this was the evening I heard a pop in my left ankle. I had sprained it. This was about 6:00pm. Me being me, I told myself.. "It's just a sprain" and went ahead to attend my belly dancing class at 8pm. Awesome! Next morning I was in a bit of pain. I went to see the doctor in the health centre and work, got a crepe bandage around my ankle, and told myself.. okay, it's a sprain, just a few days of rest and I will be fine! That night, I woke up midway in excruciating pain.. I removed the bandage, was in agony for a while before I finally fell asleep. Worked from home the next day.
I rested for a couple of weeks. I live by myself, so I still had to go to work, manage my meals, walk around my apartment for other regular stuff. But I stayed away from the gym, minimized my dance practices, and was assured that I will be okay. I decided to go ahead with the dance show no matter what. There was no stopping there! 2 weeks later, I resumed my dance practices. The salsa moves hurt like hell, but again.. me being me, I did not stop. When I was told to cancel the dance show because my ankle is more important, I politely and convincingly told my well- wishers that this means a lot to me, and I have to do this, and once this is over I will rest.
So 45days passed by, I did the dance show, everyone loved me. When I look back it doesn't really make a big difference though. Silly me!
After the show on Nov 30 2010, I started taking care, continued with no gym, but went around in the malls shopping for my India trip (don't ask me why!!). And then I went to India, got a cast from a bone setter. But I was in India.. so had to go around shopping, blah blah blah. I know I know.. silly me!
3 wks later, I got back from India, got an MRI that said there is a bit of contusion and inflammation. Went through 8 sessions of distressing Physical Therapy. After the guy made me do lunges on Day 7, I was in so much pain, I figured I should run the other direction. Now I feel I have a pretty high threshold of tolerating pain, so if I say I was in excruciating pain, I surely was.
Then I found a Podiatrist (a specialist in the care for feet). Since none of the conservative methods worked, and my journey of pain was upto 5months now, he suggested I get a cortisone shot. I had already done my research on it, and had taken one for my shoulder a few years ago, in vain. But I went ahead and took it anyway. Now I wouldn't have opted for it, because I believe in conservative healing. I wouldn't even take a tylenol unless absolutely required. But after many many many sleepless and painful nights, I decided I would go for this. He gave me the shot (one of my most painful of memories), put a cast on. I worked from home for 2wks so I get some rest. I was doing okay with the cast on, a bit of pain here and there. Once the cast was out after 7days, the pain started creeping back. Went to see the doctor. He put the cast back on, gave me a 10lb walking boot to walk in. The cast makes me feel better. The boot kills me. So I am going to ask him if I really need it.
So 6months of pain from the sprain.. all my plans are on hold as of now.. marathons, travelling, hiking, biking......

So friends.. next time you or your near one experiences a sprain.. think twice before saying, "It's just a sprain"

Ever been through the feeling where you forgot how it is "not to be in pain"?

For the sake of passion, for the sake of life
For the sake of dreams, unfulfilled and dry
For the sake of living, and not existing
For the sake of bigger challenges that life can bring
For the sake of the soul being free again
Transcend this being to a state outside of pain..........